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| 1. The North Avenue Irregulars Director: Bruce Bilson (II) | |
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Reviews (24)
Fearless and determined, the "North Avenue Irregulars" (played by many familiar comediennes) show the bad guys who's boss and reclaim their "turf". Many laughs, and a timely message: Don't let the scum take over your neighborhood!****
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| 2. Mystery Science Theater 3000 - The Crawling Hand Director: Herbert L. Strock | |
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Reviews (44)
i don't like dr. erhardt as much as tv's frank (who does?) and the riffing is more sparse and of a slightly weaker style. but i was thinking, for a new fan seeking to discover mst3k, this may not be a bad jumping off point (although manos is a better start). this episode is indicative of the true original philosophy of mst3k. most of the best episodes aren't mystery or science-oriented (manos, mitchell, many sci-fi eps such as jack frost or final sacrifice), but the crawling hand is a true, cheesy, BAD scifi/horror movie. and that was the original intent of the show: to riff on bad scifi/horror flicks. and the riffing IS good, it's just not as good as it would become in later seasons. nobody should miss out on this episode, but other episodes are better, and once you're well-versed in mst3k-dom, you'll revisit this episode less often than the others.
As for the movie itself, The Crawling Hand was perfect MST3K material--there's a silly plot, an annoying teenager, and some incredibly bad acting. America's space program is apparently run in a little warehouse somewhere in the middle of nowhere, and the scientists there are in a tizzy. On two occasions, a guy has been sent to the moon, landing successfully, then being lost on his way back to earth. This second time, communication is reestablished with the astronaut 20 minutes after he has run out of oxygen. He begs the men in the control room (actually, it's really just a desk) to blow him up before he reenters the atmosphere. The doctor-type guy finally hits the red button. Meanwhile, a supposedly smart slacker goes swimming in the ocean with his Swedish girlfriend, and while they are frolicking around they run across a human hand lying on the beach. Naturally, our hero decides he must have that hand; he sneaks back that night (apparently this is the one beach in California that no one whatsoever goes to) and makes the wonderful hand his own, lovingly placing it in his landlady's storage room behind some relish. Soon, the hand (which does crawl, just like the title says) begins strangling people (that's gonna happen, you know). At this point, the sheriff, AKA Alan Hale (Skipper!), commences an investigation. One print found on the body of the first victim is matched to the fingerprint of the blown-up astronaut, and that's when the Space Boys come out to try and clean up a little of their mess. To complicate matters, our boy who found the hand begins having episodes wherein he turns into an "Elvis zombie" with heavy mascara under his eyes and feels compelled to strangle people himself. As you may have guessed, it all comes down to some hand to hand combat in the end. I think this is one of the best Season One episodes. I particularly enjoyed one skit in which the guys all pretend to be William Shatner being choked by a disembodied hand. Joel and the bots are still developing the real spirit and style of the show, but the genius is already unmistakably there. Most importantly, I can assure you that this show is very funny.
Naturally, our whole family likes these episodes, because we starred in the original 1968 Grape-Nuts TV commercial from which this riff comes. (Yes, Mrs. Burke AND Dale are real, alive, well, and living in the USA.) Many thanks to MST3K's Best Brains for riffing our commercial decades after it ran (and to Mr. Murphy for helping to clear up the trouble about the origin of this riff)!
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| 3. Hang 'em High Director: Ted Post | |
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Amazon.com Reviews (31)
Clint Eastwood is a rancher who is strung up at high noon by a bunch of thugs from a nearby town. They accuse him of murder and theft of cattle. Eastwood however does not die. A US Marshall recues him and brings him to the judge for trial. Judge aquitts Eastwood. It so happens that Eastwood was a ex-lawman and judge appoints him as a Marshall. Then begins the story of revenge and justice as Eastwood hunts down the vigilante mob that tried to hang him. There are many interesting questions raised in the movie. What is the relationship between Revenge and Justice? How should justice be dealt out? It is a thought-provoking movie although it has somewhat banal action scenes. Regardless, it's a movie worth your money.
How come so many of those Eastwood Westerns remind one of the epics of the Christian narrations of the Gospel themes? It has to be borne in mind that the colonization of the West was once undertaken by deeply religious believers and pious colons, fleeing religious persecutions by bigots, various religious hypocrits and other political imperialists and oportunists. Redemption is and was always strictly a business of individuals, and the Far Wild West narrational environment is or was able to bring out a suitable environment and circumstances for the depiction of the various themes of redemption. Clint Eastwood, in his half-a-dozen or so mythical Westerns, has usually done a great job at this. In this movie, the heroe (self-tortured as usual with a high inner sense of justice) almost loses his life several times, once in an expedient summary judgement followed by an attempted lynching by a bunch of respectable criminal outlaws in search of an innocent scapegoat, another time by an attempted cold-blooded execution, barely escapes each time with notable scars and (Christ-like) stigmatas, to go out to seek justice and revenge. In all of Clint Eastwood's westerns, this is a major theme. The world looks like a rather gloomy place, haunted by the lost and the wicked, where there is neither justice nor reprieve for a few righteous ones, and Clint Eastwood incarnates a type of Christ, or avenging Angel, usually back from the Dead or almost-Dead, in a lonely search or quest for justice in a lost world. For a subsequent illustration of these themes, see the following - Unforgiven: The Redeemer of Blood pushed to His utter limits Although Hang 'em High presents some of the above-mentionned themes in a barely embryonic fashion, these subsequent four Western movies developped the theme matter to further epic dimensions, besides allowing for a few very realistic and authentic western entertainments. Highly watchable. ... Read more | |
| 4. Johnny Dangerously Director: Amy Heckerling | |
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Reviews (39)
Twelve-year-old Johnny Kelly earns an honest living as a paperboy with his prematurely aged mother and his law-engrossed little brother, Tommy. To pay for an urgent surgery for his mother (the first of a seemingly eternal series), Johnny joins the mob and grows to adulthood as a suave ladies' man. But first, rival crime boss Roman Moroni (Richard Dimitri, who murders the English language and his rivals) (Moroni had a lot of rules for his gang. Number one: never park in his private parking space (explosion)) and later, fellow gang member Danny Vermin (Joe Piscopo) will pay any price to stop him . . . not to mention Tommy, who has just graduated from law school and intends to fight crime, not knowing that his brother runs most of it! Absolutely hysterical. Maureen Stapleton delights as Ma Kelly, and Griffin Dunne turns in an absolutely hysterical straight man role as Tommy Kelly, and is played upon by Johnny (Michael Keaton), Stapleton, and Danny DeVito (as Tommy's crooked boss, District Attorney Burr, who subsequently dies in a beer commercial). Watch for a hysterical performance by Hal Riddle, as an obsequious prison warden, anxious to do anything possible for his celebrity prisoner. (When Johnny asks to have his execution moved up as part of an escape plot, "Fry me tonight!", Riddle replies "Anything for you, Johnny! . . . We'll bump Steinberg. Dangerously will go to the chair tonight.") The plot doesn't make much sense, but don't worry too much about it, you'll be too busy laughing to worry about such things!
The title role is perfect for Michael Keaton. He plays a suave ladies man that is a more sensitive mob boss. His foil is played by Joe Piscopo in the person of Danny Vermin. Piscopo has the funniest lines in the movie, "It shoots through schools". Johnny has gotten involved in the mob because of his ailing mother. He needs money to pay her medical bills and for his brother's education. His brother, Tommy, decides that he wants to become a district attorney so that he can take down the mafia. Tommy doesn't know that Johnny Dangerously is really his brother Johnny Kelly. Throw in the fact that Tommy's boss, played by Danny DeVito, is on the mob payroll and you get an altogether hilarious movie. Some of the funniest scenes in JD feature Richard Dimitri as rival mob boss Roman Moroni completely butchering the English language, "You fargin iceholes". JD is certainly good for more than a few laughs.
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| 5. The Sea Chase Director: John Farrow | |
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Description Reviews (11)
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| 6. The Andersonville Trial (Broadway Theatre Archive) Director: George C. Scott | |
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| 7. Young at Heart Director: Gordon Douglas | |
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Reviews (22)
Doris Day also brings much to this classic with a very moving performance. She is warm, lovely & upbeat as the woman of Sinatra's dreams, & so expressive in her eyes! The chemistry between these two actors grows with their characters' relationship; they share a number of memorable scenes together. They are surrounded by a very good supporting cast, especially Gig Young & Ethel Barrymore. This is a romantic drama with superb singing. Doris & Frank's duet together is "You, My Love", which is a personal favorite. Ms. Day delivers several 50's pop songs beautifully. Frank makes his impact here as the saloon singer, with brilliant, moving renditions of "Someone to Watch Over Me," "One for My Baby," & "Just One of Those Things." Initially, this film is light-hearted & glossy - until Barney Sloan arrives. There are multiple issues that his character brings to the surface such as: "destiny" & the strength of the human will, the pain of loneliness, the power of hope, life-changing experiences, & recognizing "love". It's worth noting that the forty-eight year old YOUNG AT HEART was actually a re-make of a 1938 mega-hit "Four Daughters", & carries over some of its plot contrivances. . Don't let this bog you down. This little gem rises above it. In my opinion, the DVD is a visual improvement over the fuzzy video. Having both the Video / 40th anniversary edition & now the DVD, I've watched each, sometimes scene by scene, to compare, both on the same television. This video has the same small scratches, circles / spots that can be viewed on the DVD; note the gingerbread scene in the kitchen. The DVD's Major Plus: visual details, such as skin & facial features, are improved: Doris' cute freckles are back; thankfully, the character "Amy" no longer has a blackened tooth when she is tying Gig Young' s tie (as seen in Video); and Frank's face shows some scars in close ups, a realistic touch for his character. Actually, the DVD's visuals, preceeding the film, are quite beautiful! The DVD is reasonably priced, although I would have been willing to pay a little more for some extras, such as behind the scenes photos... Now if the film preservationists could help restore the original negative of this classic movie, that would be wonderful. YOUNG AT HEART deserves it -- How about it , AMC? .
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| 8. Battle Hymn Director: Douglas Sirk | |
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The film is directed by Douglas Sirk, who has been for the last three decades the test case for the possibility within the monolithic global Hollywood industry of inserting a critical voice, of working within the system but producing films that go against the grain. Sirk's major legacy is a series of Universal melodramas from the 1950s, in which he took a despised, 'female', corny, conservative genre, and created the most devastating critiques of 50s America we have, with its mindless and mind-destroying conformism, its patriarchal repressions, its racism. the films, being 'women's pictures', naturally focus on the domestic, on the interior lives of socially imprisoned characters. 'Battle Hymn', on the other hand, is a war film, male-dominated and set in the wide-open desert spaces of Korea. Nevertheless, Sirk finds a way to 'domesticate' this macho genre, with his feminised, camp soldiers; with his preponderance of cramped, interior shots. there is a conscious opposition in this film that goes to the heart of the American 'problem' that would explode so traumatically in Vietnam. In the 1950s, when this film was made, America was led by a grounded military man, fetishised the family, and encouraged socially adhesive religious values. And yet Dean Hess, a vicar, a man of god, a family man, cannot live in this America. America is no longer fit for American men, primed by the Second World War, to live in. His marriage is sterile - only when he leaves does his wife become pregnant, and does he find the possibility of family in the shape of the teacher and Chu. In an America so brightly optimistic and confident as Eisenhower's, any trauma cannot be spoken publicly. Any 'illness' must be taken outside and dealt with there. Hence the profusion of US military activity in the 20th century, a doomed attempt to atone for guilt and failure, which only results in the mass murder of foreigners. 'Battle Hymn' is quite a provocative film, with a hero and his sidekick called Herrmann and Hess, with two graphic bombings by the army of an orphanage and of fleeing refugees. The film is called 'Battle Hymn', and is an attempt to unite the conflicting US ideals of religion and militarism - Hess flails around wildly for the assurance that his murderous actions are not his fault, but part of God's will, sanctioning further brutalities. He is often ironically compared to Christ, when he is actually a mixture of the antiChrist and Midas, killing everything he touches. The only way he can save lives is to 'sacrifice' others. 'Battle Hymn' does not equate war with religion (a deus ex machina is epically ironic), but exposes the pathology of the army: the predominantly dull mise-en-scene matching the grey uniforms. American military imperialism is mirrored in the attempts to Americanise the Korean children, teaching them to eat 'candy', swallow Christianity and sing English. Any native rituals don't exist as examples of an alternative or older culture, but as theatrical expressions of Hess' moral progress. the film also points to Sirk's great 'race' masterpiece of three years later, 'Imitation of life': in real America, segregation would have prevented Hess and Maples befriending one another. Here, they are made equal in the army, united by baby-killing and its justification by God.
The stoic Rock Hudson plays Colonel Dean E. Hess, a real life WW II fighter pilot who comes to Korea to train the first ROKAF pilots in American aircraft and tactics. However, there are some glaring inconsistencies in this movie and what happened in real life to Dean Hess. For one thing, Hess already had a degree in theology and was in graduate school when he became an aviation cadet in the Air Corps during WW II. He received his ordination and elected to return to the Air Force and make it his career postwar. It was not as the result of Korea itself or any deep spiritual problem. From what I read, when he bombed the orphanage or hospital in Germany during WW II, he did not have the problems portrayed in the movie. The Anna Kashfi character, En Soon Whang was an older women in her 50s and not a beautiful, half-Korean - half Indian teacher. She was Korean and had lost two sons in WW II and in Korea. She had already helped start and maintain an orphanage. Then Major Hess helped out, along with many other Americans and the kiddy lift did happen. But not like in the movie. This movie is inspiring because it does show the power of faith as well as Hess's value to a fellow pilot and long-term friend who he helps at the hour of his death. That was perhaps one of the most powerful parts of the movie, because his friend, a typical fighter pilot, has no foundation on which to stand. As he says to Hess, "I realize I was afraid to live and now, I don't know how to die." The minister in Hess the pilot finds his real calling, and pastors to his dying friend. He makes the transition from this life to the next easier for his friend and the other pilot is able to die peacefully. It is at that point that Dean Hess finds himself, by stepping outside himself. I saw this movie for the first time more than 25 years ago on television and was very taken with it. It was at a time before I renewed my own faith. Dean Hess's pastoral counseling to his dying friend had a big impact on me because I had an inordinate fear of death and dying. His words had the effect of helping me conquer that fear and later, led me back to my own relationship with God. Perhaps that is the real (but hidden value) of this movie. There is also another dimension to this movie that should be mentioned. The aerial sequences are extremely well done. Viewers who are fans of the North American P-51 Mustang will benefit from several scenes of combat flying that show the plane in its best light. In this part of the movie, Hudson manages to convey the competence of Hess as a leader and pilot. He is an excellent manager and teacher and his success training the ROKAF pilots is evident in later scenes. Finally, one of the things the movie doesn't point out is that Colonel Dean E. Hess remained in the Air Force after the Korean War and not as a chaplain. He retired from active duty in 1971 as a full colonel and he spent the better part of his career as a fighter pilot. He was a man of God to be sure, but he was also a pilot and that is where he made his largest contributions to the service. Paul Connors ... Read more | |
| 9. Giant Spider Invasion Director: Bill Rebane | |
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Directed by Bill Rebane, whose other credits include Monster a-Go Go (1965) and The Capture of Bigfoot (1979), stars Steve Brodie as NASA scientist J.R. Vance. Now, Brodie looked familiar, but I couldn't recall what other films I've seen him in until I looked up his bio and saw such cinematic flotsam as The Wild World of Batwoman (1966) and Jerry Warren's Frankenstein Island (1981)...ugh...I'm still reeling from that last one. The film also stars Barbara Hale (from TV's Perry Mason) as Dr. Jenny Langer, character actor Robert Easton, and Alan Hale Jr. aka the skipper from Gilligan's Island...oh man, I feel a serious cinematic hurting coming on... The film starts out with some kind of foreign object traveling to Earth, crashing spectacularly on Dan Kester's farm in Hicksville, Wisconsin (okay, the town wasn't named Hicksville, but it shoulda been, given the complete idiotic, backwoods nature of the residents we've met so far). Shortly after impact of the extraterrestrial object, residents begin reporting problems with radios and televisions, but that's the extent of incident. No one really seems to have noticed that a fairly large object from outer space has slammed into a Wisconsin pasture, and even the farmer puts off investigating until the next day. A scientist, Dr. Langer, working at the local observatory does report strange and unusual readings to NASA...to which they dispatch Dr. Vance to investigate. The following day Kester and his alcoholic wife decide to investigate the strange happening at their farm, and discover a number of cattle have been partially eaten. They also find the impact site, and a number of geodes around the area. After breaking one open, they find what appears to be diamonds inside, and dreams of wealth begin to swirl in their heads. What they missed was the spider that popped out of the geode, and scurried off to do whatever it is spiders do...soon the spiders begin to make frequent appearances, creeping and crawling all over the place. And not just wee, bitty spiders but great big uns, too...and they appear to be hungry. After several townspeople get all et up in a particularly gruesome fashion by the biggest spider (I tell you, he's fifty feet tall if he's a foot!), Dr. Langer and Dr. Vance postulate that the object that crashed to Earth opened up a portal to an alternate universe, one that is populated by spiders, and they are now coming through this portal to Earth. That seems like quite a presumption, but since Vance is a NASA scientist, who am I to argue? Anyway, various plans begin to formulate, with the scientists looking for a way to close the portal, and local yokels forming gun-toting mobs to hunt down the giant spider what et up their kin. After getting to know the various residents of this small farming community, I formulated my own plan...let the spiders gorge themselves on these knuckleheads, and then perform a tactical nuclear strike on the community. Do they manage to stop the invasion of voracious interstellar arachnids? Or are we all doomed to become space spider sweet meats? Okay, first of all the effects are really shoddy, but I that doesn't automatically make a film bad. If the acting, script, dialog, direction and/or characters are decent, I can let poor effects slide, especially in the context of low budget filmmaking (the cost of the film was about $250,000 to $300,000). Well, guess what? Most of those elements were pretty shoddy as well...I will say that it did look like a lot of effort and heart were put into this rather doomed production, but it seemed the director was never able to muster anything near the overall impact he was looking for, as I think this was a definite case of over reaching ones' limitations, specifically in the budget department. Alan Hale Jr. makes a few appearances throughout the film as the sheriff, but he spends more time in his office than anything else, making some of the lamest jokes you've ever heard. You can tell the writer tried to inject a comic element into the script, but mostly these elicited a great deal of groaning from this viewer. The funniest elements were the ones not meant to be funny, like the giant spider (it's actually a VW bug with fake legs attached), the theories thrown about by the scientists, and just the general character development. In many scenes real, smaller, spiders were used, and certainly provided many creeps, but what I found even creepier was the casual notion of relations of a biblical nature between some of the characters who where related to each other...none of this was shown, but it was eluded to, and given the characters involved, it was certainly not great stretch of the imagination. (Things that make you go 'ewwwww') Fred Olen Ray's Retromedia Entertainment provides a decent full screen print (about as good as a VHS copy) here with some noticeable wear and tear at a couple of spots. A real plus is the inclusion of some pretty good special features like an introduction by Akron, Ohio's Son of Ghoul, a mini reproduction of a four page comic book put out at the time of the film's release, a theatrical trailer for the film, and an interview with director Bill Rebane in which he basically points out the weaknesses in his film, lack of money, too many producers (five, at one point), and lack of a decent script, to name a few. Despite my criticisms, I am happy to know that someone out there is releasing films like this on DVD. Cookieman108
Here we have the story of a small Wisconsin town that experiences an unknown object plummeting to Earth, landing close to the farmhouse of the unsavory Dan and Ev Kester. Upon closer inspection of the impact site, the Kesters find droves of their livestock mutilated and worry about what did it, too, until they discover geodes filled with what look to be diamonds - and a more sinister eight-legged cargo that is initially overlooked. Enter the NASA scientists and their loosely scientific hypothesis that states that the crash site is actually a "black hole" emanating energy feeding some soon to be gigantic spiders and you have a truly fun-filled, barely budgeted monster movie! Be forewarned that the plot is thin, the actors (with the exception of Alan Hale AKA "The Skipper") are subpar, and the effects are almost nonexistent. Knowing this ahead of time, however, leaves you room to enjoy this flashback to an enjoyable time in "horror" cinema. Buy it and experience VW love once again! ... Read more | |
| 10. Gilligan's Island - The Complete First Three Seasons Director: Ida Lupino, Gary Nelson, Hal Cooper, Richard Donner, John Rich, Rodney Amateau, Tom Montgomery, Abner Biberman, Jerry Hopper, Leslie Goodwins, Anton Leader, Stanley Z. Cherry, Jack Arnold, George Cahan, David Orrick McDearmon | |
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| 11. The Indian Fighter Director: André De Toth | |
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Reviews (6)
This 1955 western was filmed on location in Oregon by director André De Toth and the beautiful scenery along with composer Franz Waxman's evocative helps elevate "The Indian Fighter" to above average status. Given the time and genre, some of the scenes between Hawks and Onahti are quite risqué. In the end this is more of a Western romance than a Western action film, and with its inherent sympathy towards both the Indians and the environment, De Toth has made an extremely atypical Western. Elisha Cook has a nice supporting role as Briggs, a character who learned photography from Matthew Brady during the Civil War and has come out West to capture the grandeur of the landscape, and there are several moments when De Toth's has the camera provide the sort of beautiful panoramic shots that Briggs would aspire to take. Not a great Western but there is a lot here that warrants fans of the genre taking a long look. Trivia Note: Diana Douglas, the wife of Kirk and mother of Michael Douglas at that point in hsitory, plays settler Susan Rogers, who has her eye on Hawks but ends up with hardy Will Crabtree (Alan Hale, Jr.). I remember the actress from playing Professor Tyler on "The Paper Chase." This was the only film the two appeared in together and certain an interesting choice given they each have different love interests. ... Read more | |
| 12. The 5th Musketeer Director: Ken Annakin | |
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Amazon.com Reviews (3)
Trivia: The role of Athos, here played by Jose Ferrer, is played in the recent "Man in the Iron Mask" by John Malkavich. There is another pair of historical sword-fighting movies set in France where these two actors play the same character. In "Joan of Arc" with Ingrid Bergman, Ferrer plays the Dauphin. The same role was played by Malkavich in "The Messenger: the story of Joan of Ark" with Milla Jovovich. ... Read more | |
| 13. Rescue From Gilligan's Island Director: Leslie H. Martinson | |
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| 14. Silver Lode Director: Allan Dwan | |
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| 15. Rescue From Gilligan's Island Director: Leslie H. Martinson | |
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| 16. To the Shores of Tripoli Director: H. Bruce Humberstone | |
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Amazon.com Reviews (4)
But the DVD edition of "To the Shores of Tripoli" represents a new low for the company. This movie received an Oscar nomination for Edward Cronjager's and William Skall's gorgeous candybox TECHNICOLOR cinematography. The title frame of the film itself says: "'To the Shores of Tripoli' in TECHNICOLOR." The DVD box itself says, "1942, COLOR, 86 minutes" under the advertising blurb; and then proclaims "Photographed in TECHNICOLOR" in the credits area. But guess what?!!? The DVD was mastered from a BLACK & WHITE re-release print, and not the original Technicolor negative! Hello, 11th-Century Fox! That churning sound you hear is former studio head Darryl F. Zanuck spinning 'round and 'round in his grave. Unfortunately, this movie is just not worth watching unless you get to marvel at Maureen O'Hara's beautiful tresses in all their flame-colored glory! But that's not the only blunder on this disc or its packaging. In the box describing the DVD's features, the aspect ratio is correctly noted as 1.33:1, Full Frame Format. However, the last line on the bottom of the box's back panel notes: "WIDESCREEN VERSION: Presented in a letterbox format preserving the aspect ratio of its original theatrical exhibition." Huh! Who proofreads this stuff? And while I'm on a rant ... the actress featured on the front of the DVD looking soulfully at John Payne - and who is also featured in a scene still on the back of the box - is none other than fourth-billed Nancy ("The Bad Seed") Kelly, who played the distaff second lead in the film. NOT that you would know from reading the DVD box, since Fox didn't bother to give the future Oscar-nominee even a small feature credit. Fox Home Entertainment, get it together! At this point, you're the laughingstock of the industry, despite having some of the best classic films ever made in your library ("The Grapes of Wrath", "The Ox-Bow Incident", "Laura", "Leave Her to Heaven", "Pinky", "A Letter to Three Wives", etc., etc.). We're waiting patiently for these goodies ... and praying you won't screw them up too badly when you finally get around to releasing them.
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