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| 1. Ticker Director: Albert Pyun | |
![]() | list price: $9.98
our price: $9.98 (price subject to change: see help) Asin: B00005QAP6 Catlog: DVD Sales Rank: 25534 Average Customer Review: US | Canada | United Kingdom | Germany | France | Japan |
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Description Reviews (27)
The cop on the edge in "Ticker" is Ray Nettles (Tom Sizemore), a vice cop with an attitude carrying the horrific memories of witnessing his wife and child perish in an explosion. He spends most of his day hanging out with his partner Art "Fuzzy" Rice (Nas), busting women of the night in San Francisco's dirty slums. Just so we know what Nettles and Rice do all day, and presumably to tell us Sizemore's character isn't a bad guy, "Ticker" supplies with the obligatory scene of a bust where Rice and Nettles catch Lilly (Chilli of TLC fame) with a client. The two cops let her go rather than run her in yet again after she pleads with them to let her go for the sake of her kids (!). A few minutes later, Fuzzy takes the big fall in a gun battle with a trio of brutes in a warehouse. Nettles swears to avenge his partner's untimely demise despite interference from Captain Spano (Joe Spano) and an obnoxious underling who has it in for Nettles. Yep, you heard it right. The conflicts between Nettles and the department establish the classic "cop on the edge" theme. Locked out of the investigation, Ray only has Claire (Jaime Pressly), a girl brought in because of the warehouse shooting, as a possible way to keep his hand in the case. He subsequently turns to the bomb squad for help. The bomb squad in "Ticker" is a bunch of guys who work outside the normal police channels. Led by Glass (Steven Seagal), an expert on every sort of military and non-military explosive, the crew is a goofy bunch of smart alecks with little time to deal with the rest of the department. They treat Ray Nettles like he's dirt under their shoes-which he is to some extent, or at least he looks like he is-but decides to take the detective under their wing when he shows them an explosive device he found in the warehouse shooting. Seagal finds the break he's been looking for: a series of bombings in the city have flummoxed the higher ups, but with this new evidence Glass and his crew begin to put the pieces together. Turns out Claire has information on a guy named Swann (Dennis Hopper), an Irish terrorist and one of the premier bomb makers in the world. Swann isn't happy about Claire hiding in the police station, so he starts a new campaign of bombings in order to free her. She's got some secrets about his operation and what he's ultimately planning, secrets Glass and his pals would like to learn so they can capture the guy. Eventually, the cops let Claire go so they can trick Swann into coming in, but things go horribly wrong and she gets away. Witness the exciting (yawn) plot twist that follows. The movie wraps up with Seagal and Sizemore working together to bring down the baddies. "Ticker" should rightly be classified as a disaster movie because that's exactly what it is. The script, acting, action scenes, and plot are terrible. Seagal always strikes wooden poses and delivers lines you'd find in a fortune cookie like he has a mouth full of lead, so picking on him isn't too original. Dennis Hopper, on the other hand, should have known better. Not only does he sport the worst Irish accent ever captured on film, his performance is uninspiring. Does Hopper need a paycheck this badly? Heck, I'd loan him some money if he's this desperate for cash because I hate to see a good actor hit the skids. Perhaps it's not the performers' fault since Pyun's uninspired cinematography and pacing virtually insured the film would tank. This director, at least with this picture, subscribes to the "tell don't show" school of film. We don't even get to see most of the explosions, just someone walking around in the wreckage afterwards. Worse, the booms we do see are shot in such extreme close-ups that you soon realize Pyun didn't have a decent budget to lens shock and awe type pyrotechnics. Extras on the DVD include the aforementioned "cop on the edge" trailer, production notes, cast and crew biographies, and a few other goodies of questionable interest. This is one of the few films I have seen lately where I actually wished the picture transfer wouldn't be that good. "Ticker" might well classify as the worst action film made in the last ten years. If that interests you, and it should if you like bad films, go ahead and give it a shot. All others need to steer clear.
Steven Seagal is as bad as only he can be (bad at acting that is).
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| 2. Mean Guns Director: Albert Pyun | |
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Amazon.com Reviews (20)
Like most Pyun films, Mean Guns doesn't stand up to intense logical scrutiny, but that's not the point. The movie ends up being oddly contemplative, as the script draws out a handful of troubled characters thrust into a grotesque situation. While the emphasis is clearly on the action -- and there's plenty of it, well-shot as usual -- there are surprising moments of quiet where the audience is allowed to get close to these "bad guys" and come to at least part of an understanding of what their lives are like, what they think and feel. Lambert and Halsey are particularly good here, as a killer who's come unhinged because of a familial tragedy and another who's lost all hope of ever walking away clean, respectively. Good stuff, marred only by a very poor full-screen presentation.
A powerful, and as sometimes hinted at, supernatural crime syndicate decides it is time to take out the trash that has been bleeding the operation over the years. This organization sends out invitations to the top killers who have worked for them in the past, inviting them to a meeting set to take place in a recently constructed prison. None of these thugs know exactly what is in store for them, but they all know that when the boss calls it pays to listen. As the criminals file into the penitentiary, they soon learn what's going on: each of these men and women must use whatever skills they possess to kill all of the others. To add a little spice to the contest, the syndicate stashed ten million dollars in cash somewhere in the prison as a reward to the last three people left standing. Heading up this operation is a platinum toothed Ice-T, a goon of especially unsavory reputation whose role is that of master of ceremonies. T rigged the prison with cameras and cellular phones so he can watch and hear the unfolding carnage as the murderers go at each other with gusto. The syndicate even supplies loads of guns and metal baseball bats at the start of the game to help things move along. Is this whole thing a trick or is the syndicate actually willing to shell out millions to figure out who is the best of the best? Regrettably, "Mean Guns" fails on so many levels that it is difficult to outline all of the problems. I recognize that many people really enjoy this film as it is, but it could have been so much better. First, a movie that promises not stop action should have some nice, bloody shootouts. Forget about it. "Mean Guns" is as bloodless as an episode of "The A Team." People are beaten, shot, and stabbed with nary a popping squib to show for it. I had to go back and check the rating on this film after watching it because I simply couldn't believe that a 'R' rated film would be this prudish with the sauce. People taking a shotgun blast at close range do have a tendency to bleed, but not here. Sam Peckinpah could have worked wonders with this idea, but in the hands of the stingy Albert Pyun, it simply falls flat. Moreover, the director fails to properly design or photograph the massive gun battles that occur with great regularity throughout the film. Again, using Peckinpah's slow motion mayhem technique would have remedied many of these flaws. I don't know if film fans today just aren't used to seeing bloody action films intelligently captured on celluloid, but this movie had great potential to paint the prison red and it failed completely. What a shame. The characters suffer due to a tedious, hackneyed script. You simply don't care what happens to most of these characters at any point during the film. Sometimes, films can make criminals interesting if the writer and director take a psychological approach to their subject. Look at "The Godfather" or "Casino" as examples. In "Mean Guns," most of the characters are simply cardboard cutouts serving as mere cannon fodder. An attempt to make Lambert's character, a bleach blond killer who cackles and clucks his way through the movie, suffer from some sort of flashback about the death of a child fails because it really isn't all that interesting either in its execution or in its explanation during the film's final showdown. Don't watch this movie thinking you will see smart characters expertly developed, although Pyun regulars will note the presence of leggy Tina Cote, an actress who appeared in "Omega Doom" and a few other Pyun films. Her head catching on fire provides the only sustainable laughs in this film, and only because it is so incredibly cheesy. What do you get with the "Mean Guns" DVD? Not much, really. Some trailers and cast bios for Lambert and Ice-T is about it. The transfer looks acceptable at least, and if you like mambo music you're in luck as the whole soundtrack to the picture consists of nothing but mambo tunes. Bloodless gunfire and mambo; that is about the only thing I will remember about this movie. If you want to see a good Christopher Lambert film, watch "Highlander" again, for only die hard fans of the man with the French accent will appreciate this clunker.
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| 3. Postmortem Director: Albert Pyun | |
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(price subject to change: see help) Asin: 6304998260 Catlog: DVD Sales Rank: 41830 Average Customer Review: US | Canada | United Kingdom | Germany | France | Japan |
Reviews (2)
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| 4. Black Mask/Ticker Director: Albert Pyun | |
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Description | |
| 5. Treasure Island/Quest for Camelot Director: Fraser Clarke Heston | |
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our price: $26.96 (price subject to change: see help) Asin: B0000E6FQS Catlog: DVD Sales Rank: 39806 US | Canada | United Kingdom | Germany | France | Japan |
| 1-5 of 5 1 |