Reviews (7)

Pied Piper's Twisted Sister
Last weekend I saw a strange film called Bram Stoker's Burial of Rats. This is a film that at first seems like a cross between Lair of the White Worm and some of the newer Lovecraft films.

Burial of Rats opens with Bram Stoker and his father riding in a coach and arguing Bram's future. Bram wants to be a writer. Before their argument can develop too far, their carriage is waylaid by bandits and rats. Bram saves his father by shooting one of the bandits. Bram is captured and the father is left behind. While Bram's father goes to the authorities and is told to consider his son dead, Bram is taken to the secret lair of the bandits.

The bandits are women. They are under the slightly-mad leadership of their queen who is quite well played by Adrienne Barbeau. The Queen is described as the Pied Piper's twisted sister (she has a flute with which she can control rats). Because he killed one of their number, Bram is slated for execution. He only survives because one bandit realizes that he only acted to save his father. This touches her deeply as she was unable to save her own family. She then goes on to aid Bram's cause. When the Queen learns of Bram's aspirations of writing, she commands that he chronicle their raids to better sow fear into the hearts of men. Thus Bram becomes a part of the raids.

Through some plot twists and clever arguments, the rat women are led to greater victories and ultimately to their demise. In the end only Bram and his father escape alive. Then just as the film is closing, Bram's father gives Bram his blessing to become a writer.

A pretty fun movie all around. Adrienne Barbeau does an excellent job of playing the Rat Queen. Visually the film is quite odd. The rat women tend to wear fur bikinis complete with little tails. The Queen presides from an opulent throne room located beneath the ruins of a palace. There are several scenes of celebration where topless dancers perform for the Queen. Just how these displays fit in with the women trying to end male oppression is only vaguely hinted at. While this film does much to promote the cause of women, it also pokes fun at men in power but the film was obviously planned with a male audience in mind.

Even for porn, this is bad
I am so sorry I wasted an hour and a half on this thing, an hour and a half which could have been spent on some thing else, like watching a good movie.

First off, the plot consists of Bram Stoker being kidnapped by a feminist group in the 19th century. These aren't the type of women you read about in history books, these women cavort about half-nude and have lesbian orgies, because after all that's what female supremacy is all about! Every one knows Susan B. Anthony was a big ol' lesbo.

These women, however, don't wear corsets, they wear modern-day underwear. I really wish they had worn corsets, because I probably would have liked the movie better (at least in a guilty pleasure way). I wasn't too ticked off about this film's anachronisms, though, because what really ticked me off was the fight scenes. The movie chooses to have lots of them, and they are AWFUL! The women look like they feel absolutely ridiculous sword fighting in their underwear (I know I would) and some how these women are so well trained they can beat regular soldiers. And how come the soldiers don't SHOOT the women? There are only two scenes where soldiers shoot the women with their rifles, otherwise it seems like they choose to drop their rifles and fight with swords. There's even one scene where men charge into a room with rifles, but when the women go to meet them the soldiers now have swords!! Some softcore, late-night porn movies are still interesting if you turn the sound off, but this one is just dumb all around. The women aren't hot, the outfits cheapens them more and doesn't make it seem like the 19th century, and further more the sex scenes are flat out BORING. They're about as hot as an ice cube in Alaska.

Even if you are a pervert that never leaves his room and is practically married to every porn star on the internet, you won't like this movie. If you aren't, then you should stop reading this review and just pretend this movie doesn't exist.

smartly-disguised lines like "for every woman a
a chum was enticed by the well-blossomed women on the cover of this
straight-to-video-limbo, includes the finest eye-shadow of the
nineteenth century, smartly-disguised lines like "for every woman a
blow", the raiders of the lost ark alterior soundtrack and a dazzling
bit of paired-off swordplay amongst the thread-draped rat women

THE BEST BRAM STOKER MOVIE YET......
This film is so much better than DRACULA. It adds horrifying imagination with sexual desire, and pleasure. I couldn't have asked for more! This movie is about a young Bram Stoker, getting captured by women who worship rats, and despise male humans. But one of the rat women begins to fall for Stoker, and she helps him fight his way to the top! Much better than BRAM STOKER'S THE MUMMY, and just a tad bit better than BRAM STOKER'S SHAWDOWBUILDER.

A horror version of William Shakespeare.
This made for cable movie was pretty interesting. Good storyline and a large supporting cast. Linnea Quigley has many walk on roles as one of the rat women. She doesn't have any speaking parts though. The only time you can hear her is when she chants with the other rat women. Other times she sword fights etc. A nice historical film. ... Read more

Reviews (3)

The Ice Runner Cometh
Caught red-handed in a US dollars for Russian arms transaction in 1990-ish Moscow, said arms to be funneled to Afghan rebels, the CIA betrays their fluent-Russian-speaking agent (Jeffrey West, as portrayed by Edward Albert) to avoid an embarrassing international scandal. Put on a prison train and headed for a remote Siberian gulag, a fiery train accident allows West to switch numbered clothing with that of a lesser prisoner who's corpse is later incinerated in the resulting fire, along with pertinent on-board documents. As Ivan Popovski, West is processed into a low security "honor" prison camp situated in a small Russian village surrounded by hundreds of miles of arctic wilderness. The prisoners, isolated and with escape all but impossible, must put in hard days' labor, but have decent clothing, living accommodations, and perks like games, tobacco, alcohol, days off, and village facilities for trading (perhaps with roving bands of gypsies) or to get drunk in; with a spectacular Russian Orthodox cathedral looming over everything.

In a series of incidents with the potential of betraying his true identity to the ever-watchful, paranoid, and Stalinist-indoctrinated camp commander (the sinister and dangerous Kolya, portrayed by Eugene Lazarev), West considers how he might escape through the arctic wasteland, and makes preparations to that end.

This production was filmed entirely in Moscow and Siberia by the independent American studio Gold Leaf International, Ltd. (Barry Samson's first feature film), apparently the first such American post-glasnost film, with an authentic Russian-speaking cast. Filming was interrupted by the Gorbachev coup attempt and the Soviet Union's crumbling. The American cast and crew members had to be evacuated at one point, returning ten days later for script adjustments to reflect the new political realities and completion of filming. Producer Sneller risked staying behind to guard the sets from destruction, knowing that production might never otherwise be resumed.

There is thus an authenticity totally beyond the ken of run-of-the-mill Hollywood productions. While the first-rate cinematography of the snow and ice-bound Russian village, the surrounding snowscape, and the local wildlife (some encountered serendipitously during filming) is spectacular, the focus is not so much on the scenery, and certainly not on any film wizardry pyrotechnics, but rather on the characters' personalities and dilemmas. In this, both the direction and acting are first-rate.

Edward Albert (the then forty-something son of Eddie Albert and Margo) gives a stunningly low-key and very moving performance; and coupled with his being comparatively unknown for such a potentially major work, the result is something far beyond the intrigue of false identity and escape, becoming instead an intensely authentic and personal drama.

Image is to be profusely thanked for providing this greatly under-appreciated and under-publicized film. Were that they had re-mastered the visuals. But that cost might have entirely precluded making this relatively unknown film available. While the visuals are far more than adequate for enjoying this film, purists will notice some of the usual symptoms. But there really is no choice between having this great film as presented; and having re-mastering costs precluding it altogether! A film buff's dream would be a fully re-mastered version, with at least an hour-long making-of documentary. Criterion, are you listening?

Ice Runner review
I just found this gem of a movie recently, having never heard of it. I like action adventures set in the frozen north. This movie has something for everybody - action, romance and an experience of the pristine Siberian land.

I was amazed to see that the entire movie was shot on location in Moscow and Siberia - truly an accomplishment all in itself. This is so unusual. At the beggining, there is a chase scene in Moscow square and in the famous subways with all the chandeliers haning from the ceiling.

I have seen Siberiade and this movie is visually stunning likewise. I am fascinated by the landscapes - they are hauntingly beautiful.

This was a very tender love story too, very multilayered and honest.

Ice Runner: "The Cold, Hard Facts" and "Golden-Eye Candy"
You've seen _Shawshank Redemption_. You've seen _Papillon_. Maybe you've even seen _Captives_. What if you could find all the wrongful-imprisonment...road-to-freedom-ness of these great movies in something refreshingly different, something to equal the thrills of _Mission Impossible_ and the romance of _Scarlet Letter_?

_Ice Runner_ offers all such pleasures. More like watching a well-cast British piece than viewing the oft-predictablility of so many big-run films, you'll find yourself swept away by the Siberian-earthiness and mesmerizing depth of these characters.

You'll find the pace and composition of _Ice Runner_ to be enjoyably different, yet never inferior.

But more likely than not, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat; it's a masterfully suspenseful "what's-next" with original and unexpected love scenes that you (and your Saturday night date) will not soon forget. ... Read more

Description

Stationed in the Soviet Union, U.S. spy Jeff West (Edward Albert) is betrayed by the C.I.A. and, after a fixed trial, sentenced to certain death at a dreaded gulag for political prisoners. He assumes the name of a dead petty thief to reroute himself to a minimum security camp, where he plans his escape over the icy tundra. The suspicious camp commander, Kolya, sends for the dead thief's beautiful wife, who has the power to expose West but instead begins a deep love affair. Locked in a final confrontation, West and Kolya face off over thirty-nine miles of ice as the brutal game climaxes in a final run to freedom. ... Read more

Reviews (3)

The Ice Runner Cometh
Caught red-handed in a US dollars for Russian arms transaction in 1990-ish Moscow, said arms to be funneled to Afghan rebels, the CIA betrays their fluent-Russian-speaking agent (Jeffrey West, as portrayed by Edward Albert) to avoid an embarrassing international scandal. Put on a prison train and headed for a remote Siberian gulag, a fiery train accident allows West to switch numbered clothing with that of a lesser prisoner who's corpse is later incinerated in the resulting fire, along with pertinent on-board documents. As Ivan Popovski, West is processed into a low security "honor" prison camp situated in a small Russian village surrounded by hundreds of miles of arctic wilderness. The prisoners, isolated and with escape all but impossible, must put in hard days' labor, but have decent clothing, living accommodations, and perks like games, tobacco, alcohol, days off, and village facilities for trading (perhaps with roving bands of gypsies) or to get drunk in; with a spectacular Russian Orthodox cathedral looming over everything.

In a series of incidents with the potential of betraying his true identity to the ever-watchful, paranoid, and Stalinist-indoctrinated camp commander (the sinister and dangerous Kolya, portrayed by Eugene Lazarev), West considers how he might escape through the arctic wasteland, and makes preparations to that end.

This production was filmed entirely in Moscow and Siberia by the independent American studio Gold Leaf International, Ltd. (Barry Samson's first feature film), apparently the first such American post-glasnost film, with an authentic Russian-speaking cast. Filming was interrupted by the Gorbachev coup attempt and the Soviet Union's crumbling. The American cast and crew members had to be evacuated at one point, returning ten days later for script adjustments to reflect the new political realities and completion of filming. Producer Sneller risked staying behind to guard the sets from destruction, knowing that production might never otherwise be resumed.

There is thus an authenticity totally beyond the ken of run-of-the-mill Hollywood productions. While the first-rate cinematography of the snow and ice-bound Russian village, the surrounding snowscape, and the local wildlife (some encountered serendipitously during filming) is spectacular, the focus is not so much on the scenery, and certainly not on any film wizardry pyrotechnics, but rather on the characters' personalities and dilemmas. In this, both the direction and acting are first-rate.

Edward Albert (the then forty-something son of Eddie Albert and Margo) gives a stunningly low-key and very moving performance; and coupled with his being comparatively unknown for such a potentially major work, the result is something far beyond the intrigue of false identity and escape, becoming instead an intensely authentic and personal drama.

Image is to be profusely thanked for providing this greatly under-appreciated and under-publicized film. Were that they had re-mastered the visuals. But that cost might have entirely precluded making this relatively unknown film available. While the visuals are far more than adequate for enjoying this film, purists will notice some of the usual symptoms. But there really is no choice between having this great film as presented; and having re-mastering costs precluding it altogether! A film buff's dream would be a fully re-mastered version, with at least an hour-long making-of documentary. Criterion, are you listening?

Ice Runner review
I just found this gem of a movie recently, having never heard of it. I like action adventures set in the frozen north. This movie has something for everybody - action, romance and an experience of the pristine Siberian land.

I was amazed to see that the entire movie was shot on location in Moscow and Siberia - truly an accomplishment all in itself. This is so unusual. At the beggining, there is a chase scene in Moscow square and in the famous subways with all the chandeliers haning from the ceiling.

I have seen Siberiade and this movie is visually stunning likewise. I am fascinated by the landscapes - they are hauntingly beautiful.

This was a very tender love story too, very multilayered and honest.

Ice Runner: "The Cold, Hard Facts" and "Golden-Eye Candy"
You've seen _Shawshank Redemption_. You've seen _Papillon_. Maybe you've even seen _Captives_. What if you could find all the wrongful-imprisonment...road-to-freedom-ness of these great movies in something refreshingly different, something to equal the thrills of _Mission Impossible_ and the romance of _Scarlet Letter_?

_Ice Runner_ offers all such pleasures. More like watching a well-cast British piece than viewing the oft-predictablility of so many big-run films, you'll find yourself swept away by the Siberian-earthiness and mesmerizing depth of these characters.

You'll find the pace and composition of _Ice Runner_ to be enjoyably different, yet never inferior.

But more likely than not, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat; it's a masterfully suspenseful "what's-next" with original and unexpected love scenes that you (and your Saturday night date) will not soon forget. ... Read more